Give yourself the gift of your practice.
"What am I going to get out of this?"
The beginner wants to have a glimpse of the promised result. They want to know that what they are doing is going to be of benefit. Most likely, they want to get rid of the fear of being a beginner and feeling awkward about what they are doing. Most of us feel enough insecurity and uncertainty as it is, why put ourselves in situations that expose our insecurities?
You might practice yoga, qiqong, meditation or any other form of the internal arts. Each of these benefits our body and mind, improves our health and prolongs our longevity. Each of these encourages a sense of well being, and that might be all that you need to get out of them.
My experience has been that our bodies and mind as largely a mystery to us. You notice this most when you are sick or endure an injury, the question of "How do I get better?" becomes paramount. Even in otherwise healthy states we still experience weird sensations in our bodies, our minds run scripts we can't seem to shake, and we feel a sense of dissatisfaction and unease. Sit still for a moment in meditation and you might notice just how uncomfortable you are in your own body- shifting your leg, scratching an itch, straightening your neck.
We often feel at odds against ourselves.
The curious thing about practices like yoga, qiqong and meditation is that they train you to look at your experience. They teach you, slowly, to not react to what is coming up in your experience. They expose imbalances and resistance, teaching you how to correct and find balance. Interestingly enough, you learn not to fight your body and mind, but how to work with your body and mind.
Over time, we learn to be friends with ourselves. We learn to be comfortable in our own skin. Being more accepting of ourselves, we can be more present and available for others. Instead of protecting ourselves and hiding our insecurities, we learn to stand with dignity in openness and vulnerability. Like a child learning to walk and falling often, we can learn to walk through the world with this type of posture. Of course we too will fall, and that is why we always come back to our practice.
Learning to check in with yourself, to look into the great mystery of our body and mind, and to gain some understanding of the complexity of this human life- this is one of the greatest gifts that we can give ourselves.
It is also one of the greatest gifts that we can share with the world.
Get comfortable with not knowing what you are going to get out of this. Give yourself the gift of showing up and simply devoting yourself to the practice of self-discovery.
You might be surprised at what you find.